How not to write feedback
First things first. To every lurker who's wandered through and is staring at the screen wide-eyed and/or worried? NO, this probably does NOT apply to you. Or you, come to think of it. And not you, and damn straight not to you, either. Trust me. Stay calm, okay? And please, keep writing letters, even if it's only, "I enjoyed this, a lot. Thank you!" That one letter will still make a writer's day. I promise. If you're still worried about how to send feedback that won't end up on pages like this, check the bottom of the page for recommended links.
However, some of the folks out on the Internet haven't quite figured out what is going on around here.
A few not-so-minor points about free fiction on the 'Net:
1. Fanfic, by definition, does NOT pay. We don't make money for it and we shouldn't have to take abuse from the readers for it. This is supposed to be fun, remember?
2. Negative reenforcement is a bad idea. A good letter puts a writer in a good mood, bouncing off the walls, for hours. Nasty flames, however, can stifle creativity for days or weeks, or worse. We've lost talented writers to it in every fandom I've been in. They simply left, rather than take abuse.
3. Emails are a written medium. Obvious, right? Well, that means the recipient can't hear your tone of voice, or see your shrug or grin, that should convey what's meant in a friendly way and what's active sarcasm. So be careful what you write, and be very aware that what you wrote quite possibly is not what they read. (Now, if you're actually a friend of the author's, this probably doesn't apply to you. )
4. Didn't your mothers ever tell you, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything?" There are writers out there whom I consider character assassins (i.e., they put all too familiar names to actions that I would never believe of that character under that circumstance). I don't flame 'em, though. I don't even name names. I just don't read them.
5. Flaming the author is not going to get them to write what you want them to write or get them to stop writing something you disapprove of, for that matter. I could talk about the effort and energy in writing, I could talk about the need to write what resonates to that particular writer, but honestly, it's all out there on other sites. Or write me and I'll be happy to correspond with you on it.
6. Flaming just makes the correspondent look rude and/or obnoxious, gets them put on the writer's email 'ignore' list, and -- if the correspondent is really unlucky -- it lands them places like this.
So. What counts as bad feedback? Well, the following comes from a letter I actually received.A gratuitous example of what not to do:
I've snipped the two lines where I gave him a URL he'd asked for, and the name and email addy have been left off to protect the guilty. The rest of it is copied and pasted as written to me: spacing, typos, and all.
Thanks for the tip. I've re-read Crystalline 1, I guess I'll have (again !) to go through parts 2 and three to have the Connor party.
Line War is nibne chapters to long : I gave up right at the momenbt Alex tried to comfort Connor in another (YAWN) slash-scene.
I'm beginning to hate you. LOL
Will you write something around the Constantine Line War with Sudala and Ceirdwyn ?
Anyone else see problems here? Right, let's run straight through it.
1. The slash he complains about is, one, clearly mentioned in the initial disclaimer, and two, the first sex scene in that story. Also, the front page of the story explained what was and wasn't in the story. For that matter, my site front page and main story index both clearly say that you may find any mix of genders in my stories and if you can't cope with that, either use a back button or just stay out. So flaming me just means he can't be bothered to read or understand warnings.
2. This isn't a friend of mine. It's not even a particularly regular or long-term correspondent. Which means 'I hate you' certainly isn't funny, regardless of the LOL tacked on at the end.
3 Why in the world would I want to write something to this person's preferences, after what they've already said? Hell, he'd likely complain it was too long if I did!
That's the specific example. Without quoting the relevant emails, though, I've also had people snipe at me for not updating fast enough, for not writing long enough stories, and for not writing more short stories. I've gotten mock threats about 'if characters don't live,' curses for bad characterization or for killing characters off.... I've been called evil, a bitch, the Wicked Witch of the West (and that I wasn't allowed to be hit by the house until I finished the story they wanted!) -- and, quite bluntly, I haven't had nearly the trouble some other writers have.
None of that inspired me to write the flamers back, or to do what they want. All it did was piss me off and sometimes make me wonder why I was writing.
Fortunately, the good feedback more than made up for it.
Now what?
So what does it come down to? It's very simple. Look at what you're writing. Can you misunderstand it? Is it likely? Yes, you've just finished reading however many pages of their fiction and feel like you know them. That doesn't mean they know you, however. Keep that in mind and then exercise some common courtesy, all right? That's all you have to do.
Lord knows, there are plenty of ways to send friendly feedback and/or constructive criticism. If you do want to send constructive criticism -- things you think they would prefer to correct if they only knew it -- here are some places that can help you make sure you don't infuriate the recipient by accident.
The Seventh Dimension's guidelines for how and when to send are located here. (Mind, I disagree with the one-page guideline. Some of my best correspondences have started with long feedback letters; it gives the writer lots of things to talk to you about, you see.)
My suggestions on how to do it are located here.
About feedback:
If you don't know yet why you should send feedback, well, please, read Te's ideas on it, located here.
Writers love feedback as a general rule, even when we're horrible about responding on a timely basis. The odds are good that if you don't/didn't get a response, it was one of the following reasons:
1. We're just chasing down and beating to death a plot bunny so that you'll have more fic to read. Sorry, but well, writing really is pretty compulsive a lot of the time.
2. We just don't know what to say. I know, I know, writers who can't write? Well, honestly, fic and feedback letters are not the same thing (do I hear a chorus of 'Well, duh, Rhi!') and sometimes we're afraid of sending something that will sound like a form response. Sounds crazy, huh? Well, our brains only come up with so many ways to say 'Um, thank you' that don't sound idiotic. And we've written it to other people; we forget you haven't seen it. But we're writers, so 'Thank you' doesn't look sufficient.
3. We forgot. (Well, we're human, too, after all.)
4. We feel so bad about how old the letter has gotten, sitting there in our in box, that we're too embarrassed to respond. (And my hand goes up on that one....)
5. Real life (health, family, school, etc.) ran over us.
6. The ISP/email server/email program/hard drive/computer malfunction de jour ate your email.
7. [This space left blank for other excuses/explanations as thought of and/or sent.... ]
Final comments:
This probably doesn't apply to most of you reading this. However, I'm quite serious. People who don't pay attention to what they wrote, and how it's coming across, can be thoroughly hurtful. If this makes one person reevaluate what they wrote, keeps one writer from being hurt? It's worth it. Thanks for reading this far!
Do you have suggestions for this page? More reasons that flaming is a bad idea, or that the feedback didn't get sent? Please tell me. Thanks!
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people have considered the follies of flaming since 7/25/01.
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